Freyburg

So the Bush administration is referring to their opponents in Fallujah as “terrorists.” Hold the phone, boys.
I can get behind calling people who hijack planes and fly them into buildings terrorists. I can even accept when Al Queda sneaks into Iraq and blows stuff up, it could be defined as terrorism. But calling a bunch of Iraqis responding to an occupying power “terrorists” is ridiculous. Insurgents, sure. Rebels….eh, I’ll give it a pass. But labeling everything “terror” this and “terror” that just dilutes the meaning of an already diluted word.

So I spent the last two days in Vancouver, stuffing my gullet and hanging around with some old buddies. I noticed that driving into Vancouver is a traffic nightmare, but once in Vancouver it wasn’t nearly as bad. Of course, all I had to do was head down 12th until I reached my destination.

I also managed to snag new glasses, my first pair in probably the better part of a decade. My eyes had gradually adjusted to the grime and scratches in the lenses of my old glasses, so when I put these sweet babies on it was like someone had dialed up the contrast and sharpness on my eyes.

Next up is Edmonton, where I’ll be headed in two weeks.

Why is it that when I take a shower, the smoke detector in my apartment goes completely nuts, but when I grill something, with actual smoke coming off whatever meat I’m subjecting to Extreme Brownian Action ™, the detector doesn’t make a peep?

And speaking of going snakeshit, it appears Jeff Skilling, the ex-Enron CEO, went nuts in Manhattan. It appears that, in the words of Leonard Nimoy, “the cosmic ballet marches on.”

“Ken Lay is a spy from Venus!”

Once again I’ve left the updating on the back-burner. I’m a regular Lillebuen! 🙂

Let’s remedy the situation. First off, Iraq is looking like one hell of a mess. Can’t say I’m surprised, though. Did anybody really doubt that the Iraqis would throw down at some point, especially given the general slipshodity of the occupation? Looks to me like America has it’s own Lebanon. Way to go, guys.

On to lighter fare. Here’s a guy I’m gonna go jihad on. Evidently the Lord of the Rings wasn’t good enough for this effete film snob. I know it’s real surprising to see a guy who teaches philosophy to exhibit utter clue-lackery and a disdain for wondrous geek cinema, but there we are.

And finally, for all you art lovers out there, here’s a montage of Bush made entirely of photos of American casualties, and the same of John Aschroft, made up of porny goodness.

This guy has a really interesting take on what Google is up to. Everything he’s saying makes sense, and given the fact that I rely on google not only for searches and news but also as a universally accessible spell-checker, it’s going to become tougher and tougher to avoid using it.

I’ve been compiling a glossary and guide in my head to the Crowsnest Pass, now that I’m settled somewhere else. So for your erudition and entertainment, here’s my walkthrough to the CNP.

Best place to eat: Bistro on Main….yummy, relatively cheap food. Second best, Moose Mountain Grill.
Best place to drink: The Greenhill. Grungy small town bar, but cozy and full of friendly rebrobates, including a couple of town councillors. 🙂
Best place to see movies: your computer. Grab ’em off the net, because the sound at the Orpheum (the only theatre in town) is absolutely terrible.
Worst place to drink: The Cosmopolitan. Also known as the “let’s go fight” bar.
cool tourist places: The Frank Slide Interpretative Centre. Them rocks is impressive.
best winter activity: Though I’ve only done it once, ice-fishing was pretty cool. If you’re into snowmobiling it’s apparently a mecca for such things, though I have no interest in it myself.
best summer activity: though I didn’t get to see it, Thunder in the Valley (a big fireworks display) is apparently very very cool.
Bushtown: the Compton of the CNP.
Grand Union: A bar where Bushtown residents congregate. Though apparently back in the day it was the hopping place in town.

glossary:

“Give’r”: said like in FUBAR.
“A lot of people were yelling stuff….”: a catch-all phrase in response to a question.
“That’s just crazy talk. You mean my brother? He’s in the parking lot.”: My editor’s response to my hackneyed cliche-ridden conversation pieces.
The Hilton: slang for the Greenhill.
The Cos: Slang for the Cosmopolitan.
slednecks: slang for snowmobile enthusiasts.
cremepatorium: it’s a long story, so don’t ask. 🙂

I’ve run out, so all you CNPers, throw some more stuff in the discussion board!

Stealing music and what-not off the Internet is A-OK in this country (thanks, Musashi!). That’s good to see. What’s not so good is the cable fascists I’m presently forced to deal with, who make my new found freedom a moot point.

I used a McDonald’s drive-thru for the first time today. I know most of you were doing this long ago, but automobile pussies like myself have to take these things in baby steps. 🙂
On the one hand, I can now see how convenient it is. On the other, I couldn’t help but think how this whole drive-through thing just points at the downward trajectory the human race is currently pointing at.
“yes, I’ll have a big ball of grease, and I’d like to pollute the crap out of the air around me while I do, thank you very much!”